One Step Closer!

I got my passport today (thank you priority mail)! This was of course after another exhilarating trip to the US Customs House in Philly. I brought my old man for round two, in case things got ugly. The morning involved a lot of uneventful waiting until this this 87 year old Vietnamese woman started shouting at the armed guards for trying to escort her out of the building. Apparently, she didn't have the right documentation, but seriously: give the little old lady a passport for crying out loud! She's already got enough working against her, and she's probably just trying to get back to the motherland. Unfortunately, these guards took their job of protecting the portrait of Hillary Clinton a little to seriously, and proceeded to manually escort her off the premises. Already making a scene as her walker rolled over the toes of everyone seated in row 7, cute little Vietnamese lady promptly face planted right in the archway of the entrance/exit. Strategic landing. Laying prone on the floor, this poor old woman (who according to my father, "couldn't have weighed more than 47 pounds,dripping wet") started screaming in Vietnamese while her extremities flailed on the floor. The guards who all clearly paid attention during the "what to do in case of an emergency" training module left her lying on the floor, face down while they called an ambulance. Assuming that five full grown men could handle a woman of her stature, I continued to sit in my seat and wait for gosh-darn number six to be called. Less than five minutes later, I decided it was time for Kyle Bahnsen RN, BSN to intervene and make sure there was still a patent airway and adequate bilateral circulation to her pelvis. After a cursory head-to-toe assessment, I gave the very professional, very elaborate medical advice to... put her in a chair. Thank you Department of State for such a wonderful experience and congratulations Chelsea on your upcoming nuptials!

P.S. I spoke to to my host-father, Isaac! I didn't understand a word he said but he has such a kind voice!

What doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger.

God willing, I am scheduled to depart for Busia, Kenya August 13, 2010. This is of course if I can get my hands on a visa and passport, and or don't spontaneously combust in the process. For all of you travelers out there, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT send your passport away for a a visa in the mail because FED EX is undeniably incompetent and will lose it en route to your home just weeks before your departure. "What can brown do for you?" A whole hell of a lot more than Fed Ex, that's for certain!

And this is how my trip to no-mans-land, Africa begins. . . an omen, perhaps? Will it stop me? Absolutely not!

After the Fed Ex fiasco, I decided it was no longer a good idea to trust sending legal documents through the mail. What I didn't know was that hand-delivering things wouldn't be any easier. 5 and a half hours of waiting in line and an additional $200, I thought I finally had my new expedited passport from the US Customs House in Philadelphia. Nope. Their passport making machine was down, and they were going to have to mail it to me by the end of the week. Okay, whatever. Fast forward 12 hours when I get a call from Lois saying the passport photos AAA had taken had a huge line through the center of my face, not visible to the naked eye, and they could not be used for my passport. Really!?!?! So back to AAA for new photos and let's throw in the post office too in case yet another "line" is found on my face!!! Tomorrow it's back to Philly to wait in line again for 5 hours to drop off two sets of pictures with no lines and definitely no smiles! Monday, it's back to get another lethal injection of rabies vaccine and off to NYC to find the Kenyan consulate for a visa. Rat race part II begins!